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Wtf Collective 2

Jon Lajoie

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I tried my best to as accurately write this out as possible. Just strum to the beat. If this isnt done in a way that everyone understands or doesnt measure up to "format" here I apologize, this is my first submission to the site. Also, I apologize if my French is not up to snuff ;) Verses: Am Am Mc Confusing back in this bitch F E With a parking sandwhich and a chicken ticket Dm Dm I got a liquid facelift from a fig with big tits E E And my wrist got twisted by a britt with fig spit Am Am And you don't understand it cause you're not supposed to F E Like a candy cane snake in a jealous cartoon Dm Dm And I'm gonna leave soon, but first I need to E E Drink a Chevy Chase Face and rape Robocop 2 Am Am Yo I'm MC Historical Inaccuracy F E I drop lyrical bombs like Hiroshima in '73 Dm Dm I write rhymes like Shakespeare when he wrote Anne Franks Diary E E Which is about the Civil War from 1812 and Germany Am Am I'm like the Spanish Inquisition when they killed Jesus F E And Abe Lincoln's suicide was the theme for my thesis Dm Dm Like Moses when I focus I can split the Red Sea E E Like he did in 1950 with the Chinese army Am Am I'm MC Don't Know How To Pluralize Word(s) F E I've got so many rhyme and I sleep with all the girl Dm Dm When there's more than one of something you're supposed to pluralize E E But I never learned that throughout all the year I've been alive Am Am Hello, I'm MC Canadian Stereotype F E I'm aboot to get started, so let me get off the ice Dm Dm But I don't want any trouble and I'm always polite E E Now hop on my snowmobile and I will tell you what I like Am Am But first I'll turn off curling and turn down Avril Lavigne F E Et j'vais dire une phrase en francias, parce qui'ici on est bilingue Dm Dm Oh boy I fell off my igloo and I hurt my knee E E Let's go to the hospital, don't worry here in Canada it's free, eh Am Am MC Fatigue did you miss me F E I'll be awake five minutes cause I had a coffee Dm Dm I'll try to get through my verse, but I really don't know E E I had that coffee about five minutes ago CHORUS: Am F They hired me again to sing this mother fuckin chorus! Dm I haven't found a fuckin job yet E So I have to do this bull shit (I can't take it I'm done) Am F I don't think I can sing another fuckin chorus! Dm I think I'm gonna jump off a bridge E Or shoot myself like Kurt Cobain did (I think my dad has a gun) Verses: Am Am I'm MC Knows Too Many Facts About Bees F E 50 miles an hour is their average speed Dm Dm A queen can lay up to 3,000 eggs in a day E E Just cause I know a lot about bees doesn't mean that I'm gay Am Am I'm also MC In The Closet Homosexual F E I hide it cause it's easier to be heterosexual Dm Dm We can't even get married in most states here in America E E it's fucked up(MC Canadian Stereotype: Gay marriage is legal here in Canada) Am Am I'm MC Homophobic Fucking Asshole F E Being gay is evil and it is unnatural Dm Dm Jesus said to love thy neighbor, but only if they are straight E E Penises go in viginas anything else is just insane Am Am I'm Mc Extremely Inappropriate Rhymes F E I shake things up like J. Fox when I get on the Mic Dm Dm And I drop my enemies just like Christopher Reeve's horse E E Then I put them to sleep like Heath Ledger of course Am Am WOAH, I'm MC Extremely Politically Correct F E I disagree with the last MC's Lyrical content Dm Dm It was: offensive, insensitive, and in very bad taste E E Just like that guy who wrote that song when Michael Jackson passed away Am Am Yo, MC Final Verse here to end the song F E One was enough we didn't need a sequel Jon Dm Dm Make a fourth "Show Me Your Genitals" or another "Normal Guy" E E But for now lets end this stupid song with a suicide Chorus: Am F This is the last time that I will ever sing a chorus! Dm My dad's gun was in his closet E And I'm gonna end this bull shit (I had a good run) Am F I'm gonna pull the trigger as soon as I finish the chorus! Dm Syanora and farewell E Guess I'll see you all in Hell (4,3,2,1) Am
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